Grumpy Ben

Never the most gregarious of people, of late I've found myself becoming increasingly anti-social, deliberately avoiding other people.



Most evenings we are unlocked from 6 to 7.45 pm to socialise. This is called "association", reflecting a period when it was assumed that we would serve our time in perpetual solitude (and people went insane).



It used to be that I would largely remain in my cell, the door closed but unlocked and available to entertain visitors. Bring your own tea and tobacco, though!

For weeks, of late, I've found myself locking my door and covering the observation slit during association. This allows me to ignore callers and pretend I'm not in. It's the equivalent of turning all your lights off and hiding behind the sofa out there.



This may be some outward of expression of stress, a reduction in my ability to garner the patience to deal with people in general. Or maybe I'm going through a period of great introspection, a need for solitude in order to develop and refine ways to deal with an uncertain future. Either way, you guys probably get more out of me these days than my neighbours do.